Ways to Handle Dating Someone With Anger Issues
Nobody is perfect. You could be in love with someone who is just the kind of partner you had wished for. Except…they have anger issues. You love your partner but their temper is something that gets you worried. They unleash their anger on everybody around them, including you. Even if you are a calm person, it could be very difficult for you to put up with your partner’s violent behavior. [ Read: How to Apologize and Say Sorry to a Lover ]
Here are some ways to handle dating someone with anger issues:
- Ask him to meditate
All of us go through a lot of stress every day. Avoiding stress is almost impossible. Meditation is a very effective process of relieving your mind of all the stress you are going through. /it helps you stay calm and focus your energies on doing productive activities. You must ask your partner to make some time every day to meditate. Mediation also teaches you patience. [ Read: Do Opposites Attract or Push Each Other Away? ]
- Pacify them
When your partner loses their cool, you have to but remain calm. You have to be patient with me so that you can deal with the situation. Try to make them calm and ensure that everything will be okay. You must not start fighting them with at this point. If you are calm, your energy will rub off on them and their level of aggression would come down drastically.
- Things cannot be undone
A few incidents or events can affect us adversely and put us into trouble. We get angry about those things but the fact remains that what has happened cannot be undone. You must make your partner realize this and tell them there is no point crying over spilt milk. Getting angry over things that caused you a lot of trouble will only do more damage to you. [ Read: Find out are You Losing a Friend or Just Drifting Away? ]
- Listen to them
Your partner might be going through a problem which has resulted in such violent outbursts. You could listen to what they have to say and then try to help them come out of the problem. Your partner might shout or express themselves violently while explaining the problem but you should be patient with them and listen to them attentively.
- Walk out
If the situation is getting too difficult for you to handle and you are not able to control them, then you should walk out of the room and move out. Give them some time to calm down and return after some time. They will have composed themselves by then. Do not give them the impression you are running away from them. Just walk out gracefully and they would not mind excusing yourself out from this situation. [ Read: Affairs in a Marriage and the Big Role of Egos in It ]
- Find out the cause
There is always some reason or cause that triggers off the anger in a person. Your partner must be going through some issues that making them angry. You must try to figure out the reason behind their anger so the both of you can work towards solving it. You need to be patient and understanding to analyse the situation and devise a solution for it.
- Make a video
Shoot them with a video camera as they go about being angry and aggressive. Most people, when angry, do not realize what they say and the impact their behavior has on other people. If you make a video of them while they are angry and show it to them later they will realize this and will be sorry for their mistakes. They would be ashamed of their unruly behavior. [ Read: How Taking a Break in a Relationship Works ]
Smile or laugh when you see your partner angry. They will be amused to see you smiling when they have lost their temper completely. You could find it difficult to smile in such a situation but if you want to control things, you will have to. Your smile will do the trick and your positive energy will rub off on them.
- Start arguing
You must try to deal with the situation as calmly as possible but if things do not fall in to pace, you have no choice but to put up an aggressive front. If you feel that your partner’s anger is not justified, you could reprimand them for the same. You have to make them realize that they are being unreasonable. They would not listen to you if you talk to them softly. You have to talk to them in the same tone in which they are speaking. [ Read: Do You Boss Over Your Man? ]
This is one thing you would find difficult to do but if everything else fails to work, you have employ this method. Threaten them to walk out on them. Of course, you love your partner and you cannot imagine leaving them for anything. But, if it does not seem like they are going to calm down anytime soon, you have to shake them up a bit. Even though you are not serious about it, warn them in such a way that they take you seriously.
If you really love your partner and you like everything about them, then you should not let them go because they are angry or aggressive at a particular time. Yes, it is not a good thing if this behavior persists over a long period of time. Help them deal with their anger and try to curb it. Living I this world is not easy. Every person loses his mind once in a while. You must be understanding enough to help them out of this situation.