6 Ways to Handle a Passive Partner
Is your partner always like, “Okay, whatever you say I am okay with that” or “No problem at all”? Does your partner not have much to share, suggest or talk about? He or she never initiates anything and most things you say don’t really interest them. They always seem content and happy with things “as they are”. Well, if so, then you are having a partner who is passive in behavior. Although every person has active or passive sides, it can be quite irritating if you have to deal with a downright passive person at all times. It is not easy to adjust around someone who is extremely laid back about everything. [ Read: Commitment Mania :Reasons YOU Fear to Commit]
It is mostly observed that passive people are attracted to controlling people as they can take care of things around. And more often than not, it is usually men who are passive or become passive over time in a romantic relationship. Passiveness can often be mistaken as lack of interest and affection.
Hence there are a few things you can do, to deal with such a partner:
- Encourage your partner
Even if a person is dormant at all times, there are certain times or situations which can really affect them. At such times, the person tends to talk about it and this is the time you must be supportive and encourage them. If you think that you should show disinterest just to get back at them, it will only make them more reserved. So encourage them to speak their mind, and listen intently.
- Be patient with them
Getting no response or the same ‘okay’ every time can be a buzz kill. But since you know that this is a part of your partner’s nature you can choose to be more patient with them. Don’t keep forcing them to talk or nagging them, this can make them repulsive and even more passive. Don’t fight with them for being disinterested or a jerk, because they don’t mean to be.
- Ask them to make decisions
Obviously if your partner is passive, it must be you who must be making all the decisions regarding your relationship. You must encourage and prod them to take charge of some things. You can ask them to make reservations at their favorite restaurant or plan a weekend trip for both of you.
- Make them take initiatives
Ask them to take an initiative to meet up their old friends, or arrange a party for their friend alone. Ask them to volunteer for a good cause or design the interiors for their room. Let them do all these tasks alone, while giving them suggestions. This will make them feel more in charge and active.
- Try couple’s counseling
Counseling can be a good way to work on things. Maybe it is not that your partner was always so passive, maybe because of your aggressive attitude, he has become more and more passive with time. Hearing advice from a third person will help you both work on your marriage. If something is not working, it cannot be just because of one person. Try working together.
- Make them realize
If they are still being super passive in their behavior it is high time you confront them personally about the “passiveness”. They must know where they are going wrong and what behavior is not appreciated by you. Tell them that you need more interaction and more initiatives taken by them if this relationship has to work. They need to take charge of things and it is important to voice their opinion or at least to have one.
Do you have a partner who is passive in behavior? How do you deal with them? Feel free to share your experiences with us.