Inspite Of All The Odds And Lies, I Still Miss You
So, finally and F.I.N.A.L.L.Y, you win and I lose. You should be happy that inspite of all the odds and all the lies you gifted me, a part of my heart still beats for you. I don’t regret falling for you, feeling for you, sleeping with you, I don’t regret any moment spent with you! I feel proud of myself, that, when my heart and my mind can love a wrong person so dedicatedly, what will happen when the right person will come?? Hope I’ll be able to give him more than I did, or maybe less.
But you know what the funniest part is? Whenever I try to think of someone else, tears roll down my eyes. I feel, NO I JUST CAN’T GIVE THAT SPACE TO ANYBODY NOW. Congratulations man, you won and I lost. You won cause you added yet another name to your manly wing, who inspite of getting betrayed by you, feels deeply for you. I don’t cry every night but, whenever the moon shines, I look up and remember how we used to converse.
I look at my watch and type your number to see whether you’re online or not. But then, I remember I had blocked you. And I can’t afford to unblock you. It hurts me. I look at the clock, and when it is 3′am, I smile and whisper softly- “Now you are getting ready for your football match. Or if you are feeling super tired, you may be planning for a power nap.”
I look at our old conversations and laugh thinking, how foolish was I to get moulded each time you said SORRY. And the one you are currently in a relationship with, when I look into her eyes I see an immature love growing up into a beautiful flower. But the problem is I know your nerves, your moves. So, go slow buddy. Cause life is the trail we leave behind. Your footprints will forever be there in the sands of time.
You are a lucky man, you have so many admirers well-wishers. I am just trying to adjust myself in the opposite list of haters. I probably (for sure) will be the first person to do so. But for how long, I don’t know! Let me see how well can I upwork myself. When life introduced me to you, life will definitely teach me how to live without you. I have always considered you as my inspiration but you, you always distanced yourself from me. I tried finding so many reasons, so many attempts to bring you closer but you, you never respected those. And in the end, you broke up saying you felt choked. Don’t you miss me, don’t you miss my presence? That kiss, those hugs, little talks, don’t you miss any of these!
Off course not, you never miss me. After all, you are the sturdy hunk who is handsome, tall, and the choice of every girl out there. One thing I would love to say, have balls then use them to be a MAN and not just to jerk off your desires. It is really easy to have a handsome face, a sexy body, but really difficult to be a man of his words. All the best for your future Despite the odds. We will meet soon.
Yours- Never Yours.